Reality Shows

Now, I'm a sucker for reality shows. I love them. Saying this, I realize that most are scripted, much like the fine fare we watch from professional actors, producers, writers, etc. I also realize that some of the interviews with contestants are often taped after the show is over, to provide a level of suspense to the story. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see how different a person looks in an aside during the show, to how they look when on the show. I was kinda ticked off when I learned that the contestants on "Who's Line is it Anyway" were sometimes given time to think of, or plan their responses to the game in question. The editing makes it appear that they thought of something off the top of their heads, not to say that the show isn't funny. I loved Ryan Stiles and Colin Mochrie, their humor was evident - especially when Richard Simmons was a guest contestant. I'm still trying to get rid of the headache from my fits of laughter on that show. The editors make these shows funny by making it seem as if contestants were thinking of that stuff on the cuff, or creating tension in a situation that didn't actually happen, and I'm still okay with that. I'm getting to my point, I promise.

I just don't get the dancing shows. I don't. I mean, with a lot of the shows, they dangle an absurd amount of money as a prize to watch "normal" people show their ugly side. Amazing Race (my favorite), Survivor, Unanimous, Big Brother, The Chair, The Chamber, the list goes on and on. Money is a great motivator of the masses, and a large sum of money can change a personality at the drop of a hat. Heck, even the awful "Pirate Master" gives money as a prize. On "American Idol", you can get a recording contract and tour the country. You could very well be the next Carrie Underwood or Chris Daughtry (good) or the next Fantasia or Diana DeGarmo(bad, oh, so bad). But nonetheless, your 15 minutes of fame is assured just by being on that show. Dancing shows, though, what's the prize? Can you tell me who won first season of "So, You Think You Can Dance?" (Nick, I think) Second season was the wacky Benji Schwimmer (It's a little gay I know this, I admit). Well, what did he win? I didn't hear anything about a dancing contract with Clive Davis' label. Maybe he could put on some skates and play Diego in the Ice Capades. Maybe he'll entertain us all with a rousing swing dance routine, while people gorge themselves on surf and turf on a Western Carribbean cruiseline. I think he did get a contract to be a dancer in Celine Dion's multi-million dollar show in Las Vegas. Whooppee! I get to be in the background to dance for Frenchie!! Well, French-Canadian, anyway.

Don't even get me started on "Dancing with the Stars". I've watched most of the 3 seasons of that trainwreck, and still cannot understand how this show is so popular. None of the ballroom dances look vaguely similar to something that would be taught in a normal dance studio to beginners. Samba, Mambo, Jive, blend right into the Waltz, Foxtrot or Charleston. They all look pretty much the same. The traditional ballroom dance is bent, and shaped by these experts, until they become just entertainment, and do not focus on the traditional steps. The voting is a freakin' joke, as well. Two football players went very, very far in the show, and both of them were a mess. Jerry Rice (lost) and Emmet Smith (won) went as far as they did on that show, based solely upon who they were on the football field and not what they did on the dance floor. I would have liked to seen if the country music fans would have kept Sarah Evans in the competition, due to the fact that they liked her song "Suds in the Bucket", and not because her Samba was Oh, So, FABOOOOOOOLUSSSSSS....... Oh, and the summer seems to be the worst time of them all for really atrocious reality shows. Okay, so there's "Hell's Kitchen" which I have as a guilty pleasure. I love it when Chef Ramsey started screaming at the staff and calling them all "donkeys". Just the way he says it makes me laugh. For the love, though, Mark Burnett, STOP !!! Haven't you made enough money on the smash hit of Survivor? Please stop attaching your name to shows that are hokey, contrived, or just plain bad. I deserve better, we deserve better. Oh, and one more thing ---"Don't Forget the Lyrics" I hope you lose your buns off to "The Singing Bee". I swear, the pregnant pauses on that show are as bad as "Millionaire". Nobody is sitting on the edge of their seats waiting for you to show us if the four words you are looking for are "in the bus, girl" or "on the bus, girl". Wayne Brady, SHAME !!

That being said, Rachel and I are sending in a video to "So, You Think you can Dance?" for next season. I invite you to check it out:

http://www.ican.ie/campaigns/universalmusic/dancesisterdance/myvid/index.php?v=86f3d427157a1

Until next time.